2004 October 11 Monday
Do You Trust Fat People In Politics?
I just got off a phone conversation where in the process of discussing the candidates for the US Presidential election I was told "I distrust people who do not have enough vanity to lose weight".
Context? An ex-girlfriend complaining that the reason she doesn't like Senator John Edwards' wife is because the woman couldn't be bothered to lose a lot of weight for her husband's VP campaign run. She thinks there is something wrong with a pretty boy guy running for VP with a lardo butt wife. Really, I am not making this up. It wouldn't even have occurred to me to make it up. Besides, I didn't know that Mrs. Edwards even had a weight problem since I rarely watch TV political coverage. But thinking about this it dawned on me that her reaction to Mrs. Edwards is surely not an isolated case.
The Kerry-Edwards campaign ought to get Kerry's wife to take a rush trip to Beverly Hills to be treated by Dr. 90210 and get that episode aired before the election. They have little time to film and broadcast Mrs. Edwards' liposuction if they do not want to lose the vote of people whose judgment is no more than skin deep. Best done, it would include Sally Struthers on the good doctor Robert Rey's schedule for the same day. Get the celebrity angle in there to pique viewer interest.
The large voting block of voters making adipose-deep decisions (and that is at least in the millions) are being ignored by the Democrats. This is amazing when you think about it, especially in light of reports that John Kerry gets botox injections. Is Kerry's botox just by chance and unrelated to his run for high office? Also, and more importantly, do the high-paid sharp Democratic Party campaign strategies never watch reality TV shows and hospital documentary shows? Are they too busy cussing at the O'Reilly Factor to notice what is really important to the American people? When hardly a week goes by without the broadcast of at least one liposuction procedure how can these political operatives be so blind to what is clearly of the utmost importance?
Or have these Democratic Party campaign operatives approached Mrs. Edwards about liposuction (or stomach stapling) and been rebuffed? If so, then there was an absolutely huge mistake made by Democratic Party strategists back when Edwards was being vetted for the VP slot or even earlier when he was running in the primaries. Any candidate and spouse of a candidate needs vetting for their willingness to undergo plastic surgery, preferably on live television. Any reticence clearly demonstrates a lack of willingness to go the distance. Plastic surgery is going to become just so de rigeur that by 2016 anyone who hasn't had work done won't even be able to recruit a campaign staff let alone make a run for the Presidency. Young aspiring candidates who are getting work done now ought to film their procedures for future release in the 2016 and 2020 New Hampshire primaries.
Readers should be aware that Mrs. Edwards weight gain occured when she and her husband decided, late in life, to have 2 additional children in response to the death of their teenage son. I find that choice inspirational -- plus, she has a great smile, IMO. I like them both, though, clearly, he will profit from more experience in Washington.
That excuse no longer works. Brooke Burke had a baby and literally just several weeks afterward flew off to Hawaii or some other tropical place to pose for swimsuit modelling pictures. Check out Brooke's Swimsuit 2005 Calendar.
In fact, Brooke has had at least two babies and her plastic surgeon husband Garth Fisher made sure her body was quickly back competitive shape to keep her in the top ranks of well known babes.
What we clearly need is for plastic surgeons to run for the Presidency. Just forget that conventional surgeon Senator Bill Frist. We need a Beverly Hills surgeon to make the run for the top.
In the celebrity gossip world, it's widely assumed that handsome men with unattractive wives are really gay -- e.g., square-jawed country singer Randy Travis, whose wife is much older is often accused of being in a beard marriage. Similarly, many of the rumors about Tom Cruise go back to his first wife being older and less beautiful than him (even though she was good looking enough to be a movie star).
But Edward's wife is not unattractive when she is not over-weight, which is a different thing altogether. But, then, I guess Randall was just trying to be funny.
Have any of you seen the latest Jib/Jab cartoon? It's not nearly as funny as the first one. Strangely, it seemed like almost half the actual jokes in the cartoon were on the gay theme: at least 2 appearances by Jim McGreevy, John Ashcroft announcing he's gay, Edwards showing off his "cute buns", Edwards and Kerry in bed together, etc. I've been puzzled by the whole "Edwards is gay" meme; thanks for shedding a bit of light, Steve. My wife is also older than I am, so I guess I'll never be President now. Dang.
Ours is a celebrity culture, and looks can make or break you in politics.
Randall and Luke, there is an interesting article about John Edwards' family posted at the website
http://advisoryopinion.typepad.com/blog/ (this blog, which features a link to Randall's Future Pundit blog, is the blog of 4 lawyers) titled "Whose kids are those?"
It seems quite likely that Senator Edwards' two younger children are not the genetic children of his wife (see the above article). When Mrs. Edwards gave birth to her last two children, she was probably "too old" to produce her own genetic children (children from her own eggs).
There's a technique in which genetic material is used from two genetic mothers (two eggs are used). In which case a child would have two genetic mothers. I'm not sure if this technique has led to the birth of a human baby yet, however.
Proborders: My wife had her second child when she was 44, so I wouldn't be so sure about jumping to this conclusion. The Doctor quoted in the article was being way too categorical.
Surgical treatment for obesity appears effective for weight loss and related disorders
“an estimated 1.7 billion people worldwide are overweight or obese…For treating obesity long term, diet therapy has been found to be relatively ineffective.”
“The researchers found that the average percentage of excess weight loss was 61.2 percent for all patients; 47.5 percent for patients who underwent gastric banding; 61.6 percent, gastric bypass; 68.2 percent, gastroplasty; and 70.1 percent, biliopancreatic diversion or duodenal switch. Death due to surgery within 30 days of the procedure was 0.1 percent for purely restrictive procedures (gastric banding and gastroplasty), 0.5 percent for gastric bypass, and 1.1 percent for biliopancreatic diversion or duodenal switch.”
Liposuction is not an effective fat reduction method. (Liposuction is good for body contouring.) Body fat levels are largely regulated by leptin produced by fat cells. Remove fat and the brain sees less leptin and increases appetite and reduces metabolism. Thus the fat removed with liposuction is regained.
Regular exercise and a healthy diet suffice to keep many people trim. For others, neither exercise nor diet seems to help much. (An ex-girlfriend gained twenty pounds in her early thirties while eating a healthy diet (veggies, fruits, nuts, and fish) and working out with me everyday at the gym. She became strong, fit, and fat.)
Stimulants and other drugs can reduce body fat but have their own health risks.
As far as I know there is not yet a safe, effective method for staying trim if exercise and a good diet fail. (I believe such treatments will be available in the next ten to twenty years.)
i assumed fatty mrs. edwards meant he was gay last year....
p.s. do you guys hear that david souter is gay?
She is a DISGRACE!!! What a COW
no actually I don't trust Rush Limbaugh. Why do you ask?